The self-loathing that follows as the reality of my situation sinks in is the measure of my ineptitude as a “proactive” student. How can I do this to myself? Every time! I wonder if my incompetency of getting work done has anything to do with me overestimating myself. Or undermining my inability to work under pressure

The nagging feeling at the back of my mind is present, and I know how anxious I will get when I actually get to doing the actual task, yet I sit here and type away rather than getting to it.  Why must I act so cowardly? I know I’m gonna panic when I start working on my papers,  and so, I’m going to ignore the work entirely. It’s because that gut-wrenching, nail biting and teeth grinding feeling is worst than the consequences of me not submitting my papers. What does that tell me about myself? On the surface it indicates that I’m too scared to confront my fear of feeling horrible. But what if it’s something more? I think I shy away from confrontations in every aspect of my life. What if it comes to bigger decisions? Will I be binge watching Grey’s Anatomy and try to ignore my problems away then too?

How do you go from procrastinating homework to procrastinating life altogether?


About bookishendeavors

Broke college student who likes to read.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to Procrastinate

  1. Thank you so much!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s